Illinois Divorce Lawyer Blog

Many professionals that work with divorce and custody cases see cases of Parental Alienation. Parental alienation can be defined as a social dynamic, generally occurring due to divorce, when a child expresses unjustified hatred or unreasonably strong dislike of a "target" parent, making access by the rejected parent difficult or impossible.

Dr. Amy Baker is a nationally recognized expert in parent child relationships, especially children of divorce, parental alienation syndrome, and emotional abuse of children. Her book, pictured here, provides answers to many critical questions surrounding parental alienation, and is a valuable resource at understanding this highly damaging process.

One definition: The alienation is triggered by an alienating parent. In its worst and most pathological forms, the alienating parent acts to align the children to his or her side and together, with the children, campaign to destroy their relationship with the targeted parent. For the campaign to work, the obsessed alienator enmeshes the children's personalities and beliefs into their own.

I received a letter from Chrissy, who founded Survivors not Victims of PAS. I asked for her permission to reprint her letter to me. It's a very insightful and heartfelt account of PAS, and its impact on a young woman.

Oh thank you Michael. Yes, I would be happy for you to post it. Im trying to make a diffrence for hurting parents as well as the hurting children. It is my hearts desire to help in the fight against PAS. It effects the children way into adult hood. Im hoping with my story more kids will come forward and share their story as well. If there is anything I can do for you or your parents please let me know. Sometimes hearing or talking is more uplifting than reading it. Im always here.

Thank you for all your hard work and supporting a cause that is dear to my heart. Keep up the life changing work and you have all my support
Chrissy

My name is Chrissy. Im the founder of ~Survivors not
Victims~. I have many chapters to my book of life as you can see on my website.
But this chapter is on PAS and how it effected me.

When I was 3 my mom meet the man we thought would fullfill our dreams
of being a husband and father. This was shatterd shortly after the
courting was over. My mother and I where very much abusied by this man. I
was always without my mom knowing made known by him that I was not his
child. I always wanted his love and approval I hungered after it but
nothing I did was right for him. When he yelled at me pure fear would enter
my mind would I get hit this time and never ever was I allowed to look
him in the eye during these periods. Iwould get flush my ankles would
itch the butterfies in my stomach would be overwelming. I tell you
these things to help you to understand the power someone can have over your
mind even after all this.They eventally had my 2 wonderful brothers.

Continue reading "Parental Alienation: Survivors not Victims" »