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Illinois Divorce: Personality awareness: The key skill to dealing with high-conflict people

“Could you become a high-conflict person’s (HCP’s) Target of Blame? If you’re not watchful and careful, yes. HCPs generally pick on people they are close to or people in authority positions. These close personal or supervisory relationships usually involve the types of people we’re inclined to invite into our lives, often without knowing much about them.

Avoiding and deflecting high-conflict behavior is like avoiding illness. You can protect yourself from becoming someone’s Target of Blame by vaccinating yourself with knowledge of the personality patterns of high-conflict people. I call this personality awareness.

In fact, with personality awareness you will be more confident in dealing with people, because you will know how to recognize the warning signs of dangerous personality patterns before they do you much harm.”

The above is a new article from Bill Eddy, author of Splitting ( I was priviledged to write the foreword to the 1st edition of Splitting) and the head of the High Conflict Institute. One paragraph from the article is striking, and resonate with many of my firm’s clients. Perhaps this information resonates with you, if you are in a high conflict relationship or divorce proceeding:

  • We tend to trust our emotions. Emotional connection is one of the strongest drives of human beings. We constantly want to be loved, liked, and respected. Yet manipulating our emotions is one of the key techniques of the people who may ruin your life. You will fall in love with them. You will be impressed with their stories. You will be persuaded by their charm and their interest in you.

Click the link below to see the entire article.

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